Nudging #90 - May 30, "See Others Rightly"
May 30, 2025
See Others Rightly
One of the greatest mistakes in the world is to tell yourself what a man is like; you do not know what he is like. The only One who can teach you how to deal with the various specimens around you is the Holy Spirit. — Oswald Chambers
I’ve spent a lot of my life around people—in classrooms, committee meetings, boardrooms, churches, and living rooms, both in the States and overseas. You’d think that after so many meetings, meals, and moments with people—from Idaho to Indonesia—I’d be better at knowing how to love them well. But the truth is, I still get it wrong more than I’d like to admit.
Some folks are easy to love. Others? Not so much. They’re draining. Difficult. Sometimes even deceptive. I’ve picked up a few instincts over the years—how to read a room, spot a red flag, or protect myself when needed. I used to call that wisdom. Sometimes it probably was. But often it was just guardedness dressed up in church clothes.
We live in a world that normalizes suspicion and applauds cynicism. We scroll past headlines, posts, and comments that make it easy to write people off before hearing their story. And without even realizing it, I’ve learned to do the same. I told myself I was just being careful—discerning. But in the process, I stopped being compassionate. I labeled people in my mind before I looked them in the eye.
Jesus didn’t do that.
He saw the heart. He knew what people were really like—but He didn’t turn away. He engaged with love. He never sidestepped the truth, and He didn’t shut down when things got messy. He stayed open, even when it hurt. That kind of love is foreign in a world like ours.
And honestly? I don’t know how to do that—not on my own. I want to protect myself. I want to be safe. I want to be right. But the Spirit keeps whispering, “Let Me show you another way.”
And so I’m slowly and imperfectly learning that discernment doesn’t have to be defensive. That wisdom can still be warm. That the Holy Spirit sees more than I ever will—and can teach me to see people not just for who they appear to be, but for who they really are… and who they’re becoming.
“Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7, ESV)
I want to see others like that—like Jesus does. I want to trust the Spirit to show me how.
This world pulls us toward judgment—snap decisions, sharp edges, and guarded hearts. But the call of Christ is different: to love God and to love your neighbor. The two are bound together. Which means when I close my heart to people, I’m also closing my heart to God.
I need help.
“The wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace-loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others.” (James 3:17, NLT)
That’s the wisdom I want. That’s the posture I need to take.
Holy Spirit, help me to see others rightly.